Too Much

I've used up all my tears
My eyes are dry
Though I can feel them still
Trickling down my cheeks.

I am completely numb
Though I'm in agonizing pain
My stomach retches
My skin crawls.

I can't feel anything for you
Yet I feel everything
You're in my every though
I want to taste your every breath

I hate myself
I know I am gorgeous
I know I am kind
I just make dumb choices.

My feelings are too strong.
I'm an old soul
Too old for this earth
Let me skip ahead.

Faith is too hard for me now.

Love, you suck

Love, you suck.
All you bring is pain.
All that talk about how great you are,
Means squat to me.
You have never given me any of your gifts
Not even a smile to say hello.
You just charge at me
With your knife hidden behind your back
You fool me into thinking you have changed
And then you stab me through the heart.
Though I guess you have taught me how to hold myself together.
You have taught me how to cry sincerely
You have taught me what it means to wish death
And you have taught me how to pick up the pieces.

Love, you are not even fickle
You are just a conniving criminal
And you never get caught
And oh, how that angers me.
The fact that you get away with it every time
And every time I forgive you.
You're the worst kind of person.
I hate you with the full wrath of God.

Love, please stay aways from me.
Let me exist on my own.
I would rather, I'd never met you.
Let me be at peace.
Because I would rather have never felt your touch
Than to smell your foul stench as it lingers
As it lingers after your strike.

Love, let me be.

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends

Until about two days ago, I was really down about the fact that I have very few friends. But then, thanks to a friend, I realized that I what I have is more than most. I am not completely okay with what I have and what I have are about four really great friends; some know the way I feel about them and some do not.
Now most people would read this and be like,"Four friends? How pathetic!" But what they wouldn't know is the way these people have changed me for the better. These people have made realize things about myself that I never would have otherwise. These people have helped me through things that if it wasn't for them, I wouldn't be here right now. And most of all, these people have listened to me, weather they really wanted to or not. These people have made me feel worth while. I would do anything for these people and they mean so much to me, even though I might have a strange way of showing it.
I'm so thankful for these people and I have no idea what I would do without them. So just know, that as long as you have one person that cares about you, then you are without limits.

A Poem For Him

It's amazing how the snow silences everything
That is, everything but the will of my heart.
For it has been beating for you for far too long,
And I don't think I will ever get it back.
So in the evening as I make my way home,
My heart will remain here with you,
Though you will probably never know,
That my heart has been beating for you for far too long.
Now I am sure that I will never get it back,
For you are far to good and kind to me
And you have helped me mend my heart.
And no one has ever made me feel the way you do.
So be kind to my heart and treat it with care
I wish you would never let it go.
But for that you would have to know
That my heart, it beats for you.



So that's just a rough draft that I wrote while I was riding in the car through Salt Lake. I know the grammar probably sucks, so spare me those comments. I just thought I would share this with you.